


Left to the Beast

by SeverinadeStrango



Category: Anarchy Reigns
Genre: Allusions to PTSD, Betrayal, Flashbacks, Gen, Internal Conflict
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:27:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24517660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeverinadeStrango/pseuds/SeverinadeStrango
Summary: Having been used as Kraken bait, Leo has been forsaken by that whom he once called family, and is now left to pick up the remaining pieces.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	Left to the Beast

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Dieced](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dieced/gifts).



> This was written for my friend Dieced. Message me on tumblr for details regarding similar works.

Leo had leapt out of the way of one enormous, looming arm and just barely managed to roll out of range as the landing next to him was smashed to pieces. No time to think no time to think old friend why oh why am I seeing you again, and even now after the Kraken was sunk and likely drifting to the bottom of the sea Leo’s limbs shook he could feel his teeth rattling because after everything, after all these years, he was to be thrown back to that thing for the sake of the end goal. He was a liability he was – 

There was an explanation, Nikolai said, _I’m all fucking ears, man._ Leo had no organic muscle yet he couldn’t feel the burn that otherwise would have set in by now if it hadn’t been for that night on that ship when they’d sailed by that creature. He could hear the crackling of the wire. The crunching of the metal as the kraken’s enormous arms tore through the ship her poor frame didn’t stand a chance. He didn’t feel the same pity for Nikolai. He’d once respected his superior, perhaps, without question, but this superior fed him to the monster that had nearly devoured him in the first place.

How many survivors.

Would there be any here?

You were always a liability.

You betrayed me, Leo spat. Avoid Nikolai’s hurtling fist, return it, did she really die was she really killed by Max after all? How much of what he’d said was a lie? I meant nothing to you after all. Sasha meant nothing to you after all either because the possibility that Sasha might have discarded Leo right along with Nikolai was not something he’d even been willing to consider for a second. She’d looked out for him like an older sister. She’d gone beyond the call of duty he would never doubt her not for a second because it felt almost sacrilegious to do so.

_That or you don’t want to think about it_

Do you know what you’ve done, boy! Whether Leo had truly compromised them all or not he didn’t know he didn’t know what to believe did he believe Nikolai just like he had when Ondine had died when they’d discovered her laying under that sheet not moving not breathing leaving Leo with nothing more than the last memory he’d had of her, when Max had invited him in with a beaming smile that had made him feel like he’d finally, finally come home.

All he knew was that when he’d seen that beast again he’d looked into her enormous eyes and he could have sworn that she’d looked right back. Did she remember him the boy that had his useless legs ripped off of his body. Leo had not felt rage, or the resolute determination that was expected of a soldier such as him. No. All that had been left was fear. Joint-shaking-teeth-rattling-heart-dropping fear because this time, without even one conscious thought, she would take the rest of him down to the bottom of the ocean. To Davy Jones’ locker, or something like that. 

For Leo it was almost like he was watching a cinematic. He could see Nikolai in front of him, the man he had once respected and blindly trusted. He could hear himself shouting but it sounded far away, distant, muffled to him. Was this real is this real he almost wanted to believe that it wasn’t. That Nikolai had not tossed him to the Kraken to tie off some loose ends for whatever purpose whatever reason, that was another can of worms that Leo knew he would have to open eventually but goddamn he was not looking forward to it.

How much more would there be. Would he have to endure to uncover to find, despite how hard he wanted to _not_ believe – 

It was true. And even as he dove to the ground, Nikolai’s deadly kick grazing his side, it wasn’t only the Kraken he was seeing and hearing and remembering but the body under the sheet. The smile that was no longer there and the certainty with which Nikolai had told him that it was Max, it was Max that had killed her there was no other possibility. 

Just like there was no other way but to leave me?

But to sacrifice me but to use me but to dangle me from a line like a goddamn fishing lure, Leo was thankful for this rage. It would be better than the too-fast breathing and the falling sensation in his gut and hopefully not the tears that would later come, whenever things became quiet again. 

“I was BAIT!” Leo roared, and it was partially to convince himself as well. He landed a solid punch and felt metal give way beneath his fist as Nikolai was hurtled several yards backwards. _You were a liability, boy!_

Yes. Yes he was. 

And as much as Leo knew that yes it was a good liability to be, because he was not ruthless and he was not merciless and he would not betray his own people and feed them to a fucking gigantic squid because they refused to blindly believe that Ondine was killed by Max without any other evidence than “trust me it was him” he wouldn’t he _wouldn’t,_ it was his duty as an officer to uphold the safety of the public – even against his own if necessary. He was a traitor, was he. He was a traitor to someone who used him as fish food.

Did that count? Did that really – 

He’d paused, and in that brief moment of silence Nikolai caught him full on in the gut and Leo went flying. Everything was a blur he _slammed_ back into what was either a concrete wall or the floor, the breath knocked out of him entirely and the shock traveling in waves, one right after another just like on the ship. Leo struggled to his feet, one limb at a time, moving himself even though it felt like gravity was pushing him back down because _that’s_ what Nikolai was built to do and that’s likely what he had intended to do. 

Break him.

After all he’d nearly had him eaten and if it wasn’t for Sasha – well. He didn’t want to think about _exactly_ where he’d be right now if it wasn’t for her. I’ll give my thanks to her later, later once I get out of here once I silence this one – because he no longer trusted Nikolai, whom he had looked to and depended on with all the foresight of a hopeless puppy. Fucking wagging tail, the whole nine yards and if he could have gone back and slapped himself then he would have. Happens all the time, my ass.

Even after he’d poured every ounce of his strength into attempting to _beat his own commander senseless oh god oh god how could you do that_ years of training screamed at him, the resolution he had so desperately been trying to find despite already knowing that it would never come was nowhere to be found.

There was no reason. There was no deep-seated, on-your-side-all-along-see-you-should-have-trusted-me reason. Nikolai had used him as bait. Kill two birds with one stone, draw out Max and simultaneously tie off a loose end because to Nikolai, that was all Leo had ever been. A vulnerability a compromise a threat a weak point, and Leo couldn’t even find it within himself to argue, to refute it. 

Because yes, it was him. He was the one who, ultimately, would not have been able to kill Max and as much as he tried to convince himself otherwise, Leo knew better. He would put the gun to his head he would look him in the eyes and he wouldn’t be able to pull that fucking trigger – 

_Because he didn’t kill Ondine he didn’t go crazy he’s not dangerous it’s not his fault_

It was if and only if he believed what Nikolai had told him and Nikolai had just proven that to him, loyalty meant nothing compared to a long term goal, to the upholding of law and order or whatever the fuck he’d decided to call it today. Max could be saved he could be helped he _needed_ help and goddammit Leo was going to help him, he’d lost his family for the second time, he’d been thrown away by those whom he’d entrusted his life and heart to.

Max can be saved Max _can_ be saved. You’re going to find him. You’re going to help him.

Repeating this to himself like a mantra, Leo pushed forward and left all else behind.


End file.
